看看这段英语有没有语法错误Dear Jesusthank you for this dayi thank you for this opportunity to pray.i also thank you for letting us learn english at this place.and please help all of us look out for each other and be accountable.Bless us

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看看这段英语有没有语法错误Dear Jesusthank you for this dayi thank you for this opportunity to pray.i also thank you for letting us learn english at this place.and please help all of us look out for each other and be accountable.Bless us
看看这段英语有没有语法错误
Dear Jesus
thank you for this day
i thank you for this opportunity to pray.
i also thank you for letting us learn english at this place.
and please help all of us look out for each other and be accountable.
Bless us and our teacher,and make us study many things from this class.
I pray in the name of our loveing Jesus.
Amen.
用此方面有什么地方需要改变呢?

看看这段英语有没有语法错误Dear Jesusthank you for this dayi thank you for this opportunity to pray.i also thank you for letting us learn english at this place.and please help all of us look out for each other and be accountable.Bless us
觉得你可以把有些句子连接起来,这样看起来有点凌乱!

语法没问题,用词方面不大地道吧

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